Inching Closer...

"Don't call it a comeback
I been here for years
Rockin my peers and puttin suckas in fear"
--Mama Said Knock You Out, LL Cool J

That's "Ladies Love Cool James," if you didn't know (real name: James Smith). First of all, before I explain the lyrical application, I need to mention something about this song. Whenever I'm watching a game and a team trails, then starts to cut down the deficit, it's a force of habit to say, "Don't call it a comeback." It's one of those phrases that has permeated culture (at least in my observation), so it's an obvious utterance when those situations arise. However, I've discovered, sadly, that it's only a generational thing. When I've said that while watching games with younger guys (high school-age), there's no recognition of the reference. Instead, the response is, "Why? Why shouldn't I call it a comeback?" "It's a song." "Oh." Oh well.
I seriously can't believe this physical pain. I'm on the way back to normal (there's the comeback angle), but it's taking way longer than I expected. About halfway through yesterday I discovered a messed-up knee in addition to the previously-listed ailments, running the total to approximately 43 things wrong with me at once. I think I've discovered why I don't play professional sports (besides the whole slow/white/can't jump thing): I'm sure that what I experienced on Sunday is no worse than a normal gameday in the NBA (and certainly far less pain-inducing than gameday in the NFL), which would mean going through the same exercise 82 nights a year, often not even getting a day off before the next game. I'm glad I gave up those dreams somewhere around eighth grade (a good lesson for all you kids out there: give up on your dreams early in life so you won't be too disappointed when you're older...a related quote from my youth basketball editing last night, courtesy of a misguided coach: "Boys: You are all awesome and improved dramatically this year. Your coaches look forward to seeng some of you in the NBA in the future." Don't tease them like that, coach.).
This Sports Guy intern contest has been on-and-off interesting, but the second round of entries got me thinking about what I would do with complete control of a TV network, given full reign to program whatever I want throughout the day. Here's a rough idea of what the day's schedule would look like, starting with the start of my weekdays:
5 a.m. - re-air the previous night's Letterman and Conan shows, like Comedy Central already does (did?) with the latter...I can't stay up late enough to watch either of these anymore, so if I did decide to skip a workout, this would be the way to go. Of course, if I had control of the network, I might be able to work out some way to get it fed into my gym and/or a handheld TV to accompany my daily exercises.
7 a.m. - a good three hours of the best of NFL Films...got to watch this hour-long piece called "Wide Open" yesterday, made sometime this year and chronicling the best receivers in the game, present and recent past. Great looks at Moss, T-O, Rice, Irvin and several others, driven by some great sound from the sidelines and in games. Their productions are vastly superior to the NBA, MLB and other counterparts (MLS Films, anybody?), so they're worthy of some time for sure.
10 a.m. - NBA Entertainment hasn't done much in the last few years, but their work in the 80's was exceeded by no one, so we've got two hours cleared out for any of the following: NBA Superstars, Larry Bird: Basketball Legend, Come Fly With Me, Magic Johnson Showtime, Lakers Dynasty Series, Bulls Dynasty Series or Celtics Dynasty Series. You can't go wrong here. If I'm able to take a few minutes to eat lunch, I'm stoked to see MJ or Magic during that break time, no doubt.
12 p.m. - Two more hours of basketball, this time a great game from the career of any of the following: Magic, Michael, Larry, 'Nique, Barkley, Hakeem, the '00-'02 Lakers, the '91-'98 Bulls, Reggie vs. the Knicks, Kobe (pre-Colorado).
2 p.m. - Two more hours of basketball, this time a McDonald's All-American Basketball game from the past. The '95 game will be shown at least once a week, with various others sprinkled throughout (Some of the notables in that '95 game: Ron Mercer, Tractor Traylor, Antawn Jamison, Shareef Abdur-Rahim, Chauncey Billups, Stephon Marbury, Paul Pierce, Vince Carter and Kevin Garnett; some not-so-notables, but good players nonetheless: Derek Hood, God Shammgod, Louis Bullock, B.J. McKie; garbage: Jelani McCoy). Verne Lundquist and Bill Raftery calling the game, John Wooden and Morgan Wootten in attendance, and guys like Wojo trying to pretend like they belong in games like this.
4 p.m. - Since it's now prime-time on the east coast, I'd better get to some more mainstream programming, so it's time for MacGyver re-runs, followed immediately by SportsNight. Two hours of Mac and then two hours of the greatest program in television history means I'm home by eight for the next round of programming.
8 p.m. - Here begins the only two shows I watch on a weekly basis: The West Wing and 24. New episodes for each would air on their respective days (Wednesday and Monday, in this case), and repeats would air on the other days, starting with season one and progressing accordingly.
10 p.m. - With two hours left in the day (and me on my way to bed), we'll close out the schedule with The Simpsons and Seinfeld, alternating a half-hour apiece until midnight. If I do stay up, these are two quality selections to keep me occupied and entertained until slumber finally beckons.
12 a.m. - For the early a.m. hours, let's just show Best Damn five times in a row; it's either that or infomercials, and I'd rather have our show on than nothing.
Weekends have to be different, so they're going to be all sports all day, including the English Premier League, NBA, good college hoops (NFL and NCAA football during their respective seasons, baseball likewise), and replayed versions of the best games of the week to fill holes where there isn't any live action. That last part is key: I think ESPN Classic should do those Instant Classic things much more frequently, showing the best of the week or the month all the time. ABC and ESPN combine to show so much stuff that it wouldn't be at all difficult for them to do. So yeah, I'm going to make sure we're doing that on weekends.
How did the Lakers come all the way back last night to force overtime and then manage to lose that game? Down 10 with like 40 seconds left, bombing threes, getting some missed free throws from the Knicks, and then tanking in the last three minutes of OT. Story of the season right there. And P.S. Kobe's quickly running from his designation as a great player, with every Laker loss and every teammate who doesn't get better. Last night was a perfect example: Luke Walton passed the ball with less than two seconds left, leaving the Lakers without a shot as they attempted to tie up the game. Kobe is the only guy who ever shoots, so Luke--by default--just passes back to him, no matter the time or situation. He's become less of a basketball player and more of a Kobe-placater this season, and the same can be said for a bunch of those guys. MJ knew how to get the most out of his teammates while still dominating games. Kobe hasn't figured that out.