Addenda

"I guess it's something to do with luck
But I waited my whole life for just one
Day, after day"
--Add It Up, Violent Femmes

A few quick things I missed yesterday (and I definitely haven't been listening to enough Violent Femmes lately)...

Sports Guy has the exact same view of "24" that I do. He evidently caught onto the show a little late (much as I did, only after repeated encouragement from multiple sources), and basically ripped through all three seasons on DVD in like three weeks (I took care of season one in a weekend, season two in about a week and now I'm about halfway through season three, taking a little more time). I experience the same problem he mentions about getting into new shows, reacting stubbornly and then being bummed out when I'm so behind because I waited too long. At least I watched the second episode of "Entourage" on Sunday, and enjoyed that quite a bit. It'll take me a little bit to fully grasp the characters, but Matt Dillon's brother cracks me up (his concern in this last episode had to do with other dudes' calves, including Lamar Odom--hilarious)...

Gotta touch on Phil Jackson real briefly. Is there any reason a Laker fan should not love this decision? If there remains any frustration, any doubt about the future of this franchise, it should not center on the coaching situation, that's for sure. This year's team wasn't as bad as its record indicates (Vlade's injury, Rudy T's sudden retirement and the complete lack of attention to defense all season long--I didn't think it was possible for our point guard position to be worse defensively than it was the previous few years, but Chucky Atkins, as Paperboy would say, "Not from the ghetto, but yo, takin' it to another level"), so I'm confident in a playoff berth next season, some serious roster reconstruction at that point, and contention shortly thereafter. I'm a Laker fan for life, not just a championship team fan, so these slightly lean years will make the successful ones that much sweeter when they return...

Speaking of coaches, remember the whole Pat Summitt-Dean Smith ridiculousness that had me so fired up a few months ago? If not, a quick refresher: News stories were promoting the fact that Summitt had tied and then broken Dean Smith's career victories record, but my vehement disagreement centered on the fact that she coaches GIRLS. Dean Smith coached MEN. They're two totally different entities; don't combine them (I'm sorry, I'm getting fired up about this all over again). Anyways, the concept is rearing its ugly head once again, this time involving the Japanese leagues in baseball. Two separate things happened over the last two days that brought this into question: Ichiro collected career hit number 1000 Tuesday night, which is a great accomplishment for a guy in just his fifth season. The argument was raised about considering his Japanese numbers when he's eventually eligible for the Hall of Fame (he had like 1300 hits over there). Hideo Nomo won a game last night, and the ESPN Radio update (I think it was Bob Picozzi--did you knowsie?) mentioned that "Nomo collected his 200th career victory...[pause for effect...I think to myself, 'Does Hideo Nomo really have 200 wins? Wow, that's a lot. Good for him. I remember when he was rookie of the year, but then he sucked for a while, didn't he? Oh well, 200 wins. Cool.' End of pause]...78 of them came in Japan." Come on now. If more than a third of his wins happened in another country, why is this even being mentioned? Major League Baseball is a single entity, and all of its records--however steroid-inflated they may be--are set and broken in Major League Baseball games ONLY. Not Japanese leagues, not minor leagues, not the Fox softball league (or else my buddy Bernie would be ahead of Ty Cobb with a career batting average over .500), and not anything but Major League Baseball. Dr. J's career NBA numbers don't include his ABA marks, and that's a much closer affiliation than Japan and MLB. As far as the Hall of Fame goes, the answer to that question is in the institution's title: The National Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum. See that first word? "National." Not international. Just one nation. I'm sure he'll be a Japanese hall of famer, but his numbers here (Ichiro mostly; I don't think Hideo's in any danger of nearing hall of fame status) will have to be sufficient (and if he can last 'til the age of 40, they just may be good enough).

Ah, youth baseball. I think the playoffs weeded out not only the lower-quality teams, but the lower-quality writers as well (I should research the correlation between writing ability and team success, but I won't), so our vault is not quite as full for the final week of editing. Oh but don't worry, we still managed to unearth a few gems to send the LCJBSA into the summmer:
- "After blowing a 7-5 lead on too many walks and some charitable defense..."
This is a much more euphemistic way of approaching the awful game than the coach we had a week or two ago that talked about the awful defense and walks. These guys are learning (maybe somebody gave them the Nickels & Dimes link)--"charitable" is about as nice as you can put it when your little guys can't catch anything...way to go
- "While our hats are off to the A's, no team has ever won 16 games in Babe Ruth before and all the players on the Red Sox are to be congratulated on one of the finest season's in Babe Ruth history."
This was the sour grapes from the Red Sox coach whose undefeated season came to an end in the championship game. "Sure they won, but we were still better than them!" Not sure that logic works. Bob Stoops, after the Orange Bowl: "Okay, yeah, so they ran and passed all over us and didn't let us do jack squat offensively. So they blew us out and showed us that we didn't even belong in the same stadium. So Auburn should have been here instead of us. I know, I know. But we had an unedfeated regular season. Doesn't anyone care?" Wouldn't fly, Coach, trust me.
- "Ragsdale says good bye to La Canada this month, as their family moves back to Texas (we'll miss you Ragsdales). James Toomarian (playing smart at first for two outs in the game) got a hit in the 3rd..."
Two great ones here, the first of which is an incredibly unnecessary personal note to the Ragsdale clan (nice people though, for sure). You already know how I feel about these things. If you're really going to miss them, the league website isn't the best place to tell them. I'm fairly certain of this. Buy them a nice little card (there's a Hallmark store right there next to TJ Maxx that should have plenty of options for you), have your wife pick up a flower arrangement from Eiji's and maybe even a knick-knack or two from the Apple Cart (came up last night as the personification of the word "gossip"), then drop them by the Ragsdale home some random afternoon. You could even rcognize the youngster and his parents at a team gathering, if you so desire. Just keep it away from my territory, that's all I ask. The second thing is the phrase "playing smart at first for two outs." How does one do this, praytell? Catch the ball that the third baseman throws in your direction? Is that smart enough? Stand on the bag when the shortstop is getting ready to throw it to you? Maneuver under a pop-up so that when it comes down, it'll hopefully end up in your glove? I wish I'd been privy to this display of smarts at first, because I'm really having a tough time grasping it. Did he stop playing smart after two outs? I've gotta know...
- "Congradulate the Cub's for a great season and finishing in the final four. The Pirate's advance to the Final's on Saturday."
Congradulate? I suppose I can forgive that one, but this guy has no concept of pluralization, a problem which is a constant annoyance in my editing experience. What does the Cub own here? Does the Final possess something too? "The Pirate's advance?" Is he writing a book and got a bunch of money up front from Random House? I'd be interested in this, I think, if there were a real pirate living in La Canada, hanging out at youth baseball games, and writing a book about his experiences. "You know, I really had a great time sailing the seas and pillaging boats, but there's only so much of that a man can take. After the last episode with that ghost ship, I knew it was time to turn my focus elsewhere: to training America's--correct use of the apostrophe here--youth in the finer arts of the sacrifice bunt. Of course, the kids do ask about my eye patch, and I have a tough time recounting the story for them. I probably shouldn't bring the jugs of rum around the dugout, but I don't think it's a huge problem just yet. I'll admit, it is hard to show the proper grip on a bat with the hook I've got instead of my left hand. I do have to find a place for my shoulder parrot too, because the umpires think it's me yelling at them most of the time. But I'm convinced these obstacles will only make me stronger, and a better baseball coach in the end. Arrrr." I'm captivated already...
- "Thanks to all who supported the Pirate's and congradulations to the Red Sox Mustang 9 champs."
After winning his semifinal contest, the same coach showed how much he had learned with this nugget from the final game. Just for fun...

Yeah, Nikki's in today, so I'd better get to work right quick. LCHS graduation tonight, watching the kids I started hanging out with as eighth graders now exiting high school. Makes me feel pretty darn old...